Saturday, May 21, 2011

Rapture today!

If Harold Camping is correct, today is the day of the rapture.

Stay tuned for details throughout the day, we will give you regular updates as we obtain more information.

8:03 AM : I woke up and my wife is not in bed. Looked around the house, and she is nowhere to be seen. Her truck is still here though.

8:57 AM: There is no one at the neighbor's house. My dogs are pooping all over his yard, undisturbed.

9:03 AM: Tuned in to FOX News. No sign of intelligent life there.

9:06 AM: I begin to worry that my Christian tenants will not be able to pay the rent anymore. They are not answering the phone. If they broke their lease agreement by leaving for Heaven, I swear there will be Hell to pay.

9:48 AM: I am beginning to calm down. I get the car ready to go do some looting.

10:08 AM: I bring my toolbox in case the car breaks down; Maybe my mechanic's been raptured away too...

10:10 AM: Texting and driving right now. No cops around. The word on the street is that Macho Man Randy Savage did not die yesterday, as evidenced by the government's refusal to release photos of the body. Conspiracy theorists make the bold claim that the rapture actually started yesterday with Macho Man,  and the government has been trying to cover it up.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Imagine a world without guns - PART II

Today, in a Canary Islands supermarket, a man stole a knife and decapitated a random woman with it, and escaped with her head.

Yet somehow, anti-gun propagandists want us to believe that psychopaths need guns to fulfill their depraved murder fantasies. The truth is, psychopaths will kill no matter what weapons are available to them. They will not be stopped by a gun ban.

Read about it here:

Why was bin Laden buried at sea?

In a recent Time magazine article, it is mentioned that bin Laden's body was buried at sea*, because a land burial site would have been turned into a shrine that would have attracted terrorists.

"But the lingering question is, Why at sea? The official said that finding a country willing to accept the remains of the world's most wanted terrorist would have been difficult, so the decision was made to bury bin Laden at sea. Furthermore, one suspects that the U.S. would not have wanted there to be a grave site for fear of it turning into a place of worship for bin Laden's followers."


This is a stupid reason.

Had bin Laden's burial place been turned into a shrine by his followers, we could have known exactly where to find them. Now, instead, we have no fraking clue where they are. They missed their chance to take the needle out of the haystack, and they blew it (when they could have blown up his followers instead).

Really fraking brilliant. They flushed a really good booby trap lure down a toilet.

*side note; people aren't technically "buried" at sea, they're actually just dumped overboard. The English language is silly like that.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Interview

I was recently interviewed by Bret "Ginx" Alan, author of the Anything But Theist blog. Occasionally Ginx and I will have an argument about crap we disagree about, generally about how awesome I think guns are, although we kept it civil for the interview.

Go out there and check out his blog.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Is student financial aid enabling rising tuition costs?

Financial aid helps many students afford a college education. And with astronomical costs, it's the only way many Americans can ever hope to attend a University.

The problem with it, is that because colleges know that financial aid is available, they can raise their tuition and fees and maintain enrollment levels. In effect, the wide availability of financial aid is contributing to the rise of tuition.

Without financial aid, I theorize, colleges would have to lower their tuition costs in order to maintain enrollment.


Do you agree that college is too expensive?

Do you think the 'college business' is a scam and that most people never use anything they learn there?

Note to self #678*

*Ok, 678 is a random number. Who cares?

Tonight on my way home from work, I stopped by the Red Cross to make a blood donation.

The problem is, I had a vigorous weight lifting session at lunch time, and as a result, I was slightly dehydrated. Apparently, the exertion draws all the blood to the muscles, and no matter how much water you drink afterwards, you are still slightly dehydrated for the next 24 hours. Anyway. I got dizzy.

No, I didn't look at the bag of blood this time. (Never do that, FYI... "That all came out of my body???")

They didn't even have free pizza tonight. Usually they do. I had to settle for a nasty dry donut. Well, maybe not nasty, but it wasn't pizza, that's for sure.

I don't know why I'm always in there giving blood. There is zero benefit to me. (Other than free food and raffle tickets.) Maybe it's because once in a while I dare answering the phone when they call, and then I don't want to say no.

So the moral of the story is, if you want to save a life, give blood. Just make sure to skip the gym on that day. And never look at the bag of blood.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Kalam Gun-Toting Argument

(1) Self-defense is a human right.
(2) Guns allow for self-defense.
(3) Gun possession is a human right.

No body, no murder?

According to Wikipedia, "Conviction for murder in the absence of a body is possible; although historically, cases of this type have been hard to prove, the prosecution must rely on other evidence, usually circumstantial."

Imagine a fictitious murder trial, where a zealous Attorney General is bringing murder charges against the man who shot Osama bin Laden.

In the absence of Osama bin Laden's body, can the shooter be convicted?

There may be blood, there may be shell casings, but without a body, can the prosecution prove beyond a reasonable doubt that there was in fact murder?

To obtain a conviction in this fictitious trial, the prosecution would have to bring convincing circumstantial evidence, such as, for instance, blood matching bin Laden's DNA, or a tooth matching his dental records, a video of his brains being blown out, or a pile of equally convincing corroborating evidence.

Then there is always the matter to independently verify that the evidence gathered by the prosecution was not falsified.

Notice that I am not proposing any conspiracy theory. I am simply highlighting different types of evidence that a court of law may require for a conviction.