Saturday, January 15, 2011

Bring Back Trial by Combat

The judicial duel is an ancient germanic tradition that has sadly decreased in popularity in recent centuries. While deemed barbaric by wussy modern standards, it had its advantages. It offered claimants and defendants the ability to settle the score the old-fashioned way, without recourse to expensive lawyers. If both parties agree to engage in a duel to resolve their dispute, why prohibit it? It's a consensual act.

As a matter of fact, it may already be legal in the United States: "The United States inherited its common law traditions from the English system after it declared its independence in 1776, with precedents before that date entrenched in the American jurisprudence, as the Rule in Shelley's Case in property law has. The British, however, did not abolish wager by battle until 1819 after Ashford v Thornton, as noted above, and since independence no court in the United States has addressed the issue of whether this remains a valid alternative to a civil action under the law.
source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trial_by_combat

So next time you are being summoned to court, consider asking the judge permission to beat the crap out of the claimant. (Or the defendant, if the roles are reversed.)

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