Tuesday, December 28, 2010

No wonder you are fat

One time I was a the supermarket, and in the meat aisle, I saw something quite disturbing. A completely obese family (mom, dad and kids) filling their shopping cart full of hams and other meats. It didn't seem as if they were restauranteurs shopping for the evening's menu, but rather a poor family stocking up on 49-cent-per-pound corn-fed protein. It was quite surreal, and I had trouble believing what I was seeing. In my mind, I came up with a list of questions that I shall now share with my occasional reader:

Don't you eat anything else? What are you stocking up for? Don't you have sufficient fat reserves already? Are you buying this with food stamps? Is medicaid going to pay for your quadruple bypass surgery and your lifetime supply of insulin? I hope you put some of that in a chest freezer and don't try to eat it all in one sitting. Ever heard of vegetables? Why buy such a large ham, can't you just cook your son at 350F for an hour? Are you going to put all that in your '92 sedan or are you going to push the shopping cart all the way back to the section 8 tenement?

I'm not writing this with the express purpose of offending anyone, but, I feel that sometimes misery is optional.

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